its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
