Define "chronic" masturbator.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
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Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
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