I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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