Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Randomize
