Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
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