Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
