Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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