Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Randomize
