Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize