I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
These People Are So Awkward You’ll Get Embarrassed
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
These People Encountered Celebrities in Bizarrely Normal Places
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"