a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Randomize
