Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Randomize