I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
