no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Randomize
