For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Randomize
