i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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