im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Randomize
