did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Sorry my hands just texted you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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