I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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