Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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