Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Randomize
