you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
