Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
