how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
