im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
