Pregnant stripper...not hot.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
That accounts for only three of the penises
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Randomize
