oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
