You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
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