Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
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