Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
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