She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Randomize