Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
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