sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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