Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
Randomize
