I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
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