On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Randomize
