You smell like stripper and shame
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Randomize
