Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
