We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
