I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Randomize