Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
it glows. i had to have it.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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