Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Randomize
