I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize
