How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
