You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
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