Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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