he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
