it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Randomize
