Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I will pee on everything he values.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
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