What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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