Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Randomize
