would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
